That Will Do…

Ladies and gentlemen, this is notice. I cannot continue gaining the weight I already once lost. As someone told me when I said I was having problems bingeing, “That is not you.”

He is correct. I know how to do this, so I got my gear out, put on my tough suit, and started toward where I must be.

Working with weights on gives an extra special burn. Pain, yeah, going to rock it to the prize.

On antipsychotics and antidepressants, it is difficult to avoid weight gain. They are drugs that cause it. I have even lost a considerable amount in opposition to the prescriptions before. I have not gained back to where I was when my journey started in 2013, but if I do not take action, I will. My appetite never lets up, it hounds me 24/7/365, but I, I am stronger than my urges. I will succeed at this again.

I am a tremble with fear and hope, but is it not always like that when we run up against the impossible and choose to conquer it?

Never Forgotten

One September Morning

One September morning
The entire world awoke
With no inkling or forewarning
Cherished dreams would die in smoke.

Another Tuesday
Like so many others…
No one apprehended that day
Would affect so many mothers.

One September morning
Terrorists tried to destroy
Our country without warning,
However, it did not work, their ploy.

Another Tuesday
That will live forever;
The bravery and sorrow of the day,
We will not forget, not ever.

One September morning
Love reached out calling
Even as we all began mourning,
Our nation was not falling.

Another Tuesday
When God was in control
Although throughout that dark day
The catastrophe tried every soul.

One September morning
Remembered by history;
A brilliantly promising morning
In a place proud and free.

Another Tuesday
When America found unity…
No matter what people might say,
We still have our liberty.

One September morning
When the whole world did cry
With new respect aborning
For the noble flag, we yet fly…

Jo Ann Joyce Anita Jordan
© September 8, 2002

It took me almost a year to process the tragedy of September 11, 2001. My pastor read this poem in our remembrance service.

I still fall to pieces when this comes round, the lost of life breaks my heart. The loss of innocence saddens my soul.

It was the final thing that fell into place to compel my son, Alex, to serve.

I post this here that we may never forget.

Allowances

On days like this, it is hard to put my stuff out. I have the vow to trip over. The one that says I will post every day this year, and yeah, it is looking like that may become my permanency. It gives me the incentive to work when I might be tempted to go idle. What do you do to motivate yourself, or if you are not producing as you like, how can you make a change?

I have written four pages in the journal today, but I could so not post. Just go on reading the novel I want to complete, and wanting the chocolate I will not bring home. If I go to Aldi and get it, I will binge, to the degree I will eat almost nothing else until it is gone. Nope. I went to Sam’s Club the other day and am proud to say neither Nutella nor Airheads jumped in my cart. These sorts of things I battle regularly. What do you fight with every ounce of self you can muster? Is it food, television, books, shopping, negativity? You can win, at least sometimes. The more you win, the easier the next scrimmage will become.

I have played no music today, which is an anomaly. It has been me and my brain. Always a bit of a stretch, kind of like I imagine bungee jumping in the Grand Canyon, terrifying and exhilarating at once. What happens when you step out of your routine? Can you stick to it as you would like?

Anyway, I hope you have a rewarding evening and accomplish something that makes you smile.

My Purple Pen

There are times, places,
Avoided by almost all
Who choose, because we wish
LIVES,
But confrontation, conflict
FREE;
Experience, which will never be.
Strife presents in
So many situations,
PERSONALITIES,
Being a cumulative fact,
A sign circumstance must
ALTER,
Bend with change.
Growth is destiny, even
When forced, violent,
But peace is hoped, dared to pray,
For loss is not a price
APPROVED
Ever to be paid.
We dance our lines – listen,
Consonants beg humbly
Vowels murmur softly
ANGELS
Blend resonant voices
Among mere mortal entreaties;
The most possible, impossible
DREAM,
Liberty for every person, entity,
Who lives and will in
The future survive,
ALIVE –
The story to continue
Injustice, inhumanity to quell:
Happiness, love, peace…
ALL IS WELL!

As a prompt, do something different in your creative practice. If you work mostly on devices, go analog; use pens, change them about; work inside, go out. Variety can kick your brain into a different mindset. If you like share what develops.

Thank you for visiting Haphazard Creative. Your participation means a great deal to me. If you would like, please follow the site, alternatively come back as you will.

It is my hope that you are doing well and that even in this strange year you are making progress toward your goals. Life is a fascinating adventure when you dive into what comes.