A Voice, Recalling

When we lose someone, we lose a world. Like pulled dandelions, what we shared no longer grows, and memories begin their inexorable progression toward erasure.

Loss is not a welcome thing, but the world relies on change to bring new worth. We are only brief figments here on earth.

I remember playing with the cigar box full of marbles as a child. They were of different sizes, colors, like jewels to me. I made them families, heroes, nobles, gave them ages, dispositions, names. One would sit in the hole on the clipboard’s clip and tell the others what to do. Each globe would, in the different voices I contrived and assigned, live life in child-time.

When my son was small, I got him Weebles with their cute rounded bodies and affable faces. It occurs to me today why I preferred Weebles to the other brand: the marbles influenced me.

What life deposits in our hands, heads, hearts, pockets, shoes, we may not recognize until some complexity pulls it into mind. The sea awash within a brain is a many furrowed swell; the trenches have their heads and tales to tell.

I am not fond of goodbyes. Usually, it is me who must go away, and life goes on ever else. Death, though, is another story. All that is left to hold are anecdotes, pictures, memories we wrote. The pain is like a hammer to the brain, the million shards left of the heart; together, these foist into life oceans of tears. Even as the years go by, there are days when all fails, but the sobs that will not stop.

I would go back to the marbles if I could, but they left my inventory’s grasp somewhere in the years. Like so much along the way, I only have recollections of what I believe was yesterday. Without artifacts, there are questions, questions arresting and bold.

Today is, we can
Maybe, make a memory
Shining beautiful,
So the mind will forever
Keep it safely untarnished.

Reading books can be a treasure of inspiration.

As a prompt, take something you are reading, pick a phrase, let it marinate in your consciousness. Then write until your soul exhausts the subject, at least for a time.

Gratitude List

I am thankful:

I am here; there were many near misses.
I still learn and am teachable.
Technology astounds, confounds, and fascinates me.
Color adds so much to our lives.
Electricity keeps the world going on.

If we all work together separately, we can bring the world into a state of art. Creativity is a portion of love.

© Jo Ann J. A. Jordan

Interesting Times

When words buckle beneath the pressure to flow, all I know is to let go. I have not found a magic token to purchase creativity’s flow.

I kept hoping that my Facebook account would be reinstated, but it appears I lost it permanently on August 5th. It is sad. Friends have told me I should make a new account, but I think if they take mine, I can not begin again.

Maui, Wookie, and Tribble

I am dog sitting Maui for Alex while he is in transition to a more permanent home. You might notice Tribble is least concerned and going her way.

I am not quite sure how I forgot in my troubleshooting to unplug the device, but I called Amazon for help. I felt about as dumb as ever.

The Samsung A32 is working far above my expectations. I love using my phone again.

Having a refrigerator is a blast. Almost three months without one, I am so glad that is over.

I am using Twitter a bit. My Facebook friends are not all on there, but it is okay.

Writing is an exploration of thoughts that come to mind when we march words onto the page. The war begins when we force them into intense sense by editing such that we bleed grammar and style.

Happy Labor Day! I hope you have time to enjoy a break.

© Jo Ann J. A. Jordan

High Date

Today is my son Alex’s birthday. I hesitate to reveal his age because I am not old enough, but he is 33 years old today. If a child has ever been a blessing, Alex is one.

There are so many accomplishments he made of which I am proud. The thing most touching to my heart is that we are best friends.

Understandably I am spending time with him since he is local. It is the first time since 2006 we have been together on his day. So you will pardon me for a brief entry.

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I feel we play now
Off the staff, without clef, bars,
Improvisation.

///////////////

Tuning instruments
Preparing the score, once more,
In harmony, join.

© Jo Ann J. A. Jordan

Learning, Living

Beginning: I was love,
Softness in words, deeds,
Meeting incessant needs.
Time taught: The world,
A hard place to fall;
My mistakes, misdeeds
Caused cruel stinging pain.
Learning: Reading, writing,
Were who I quickly became.
Maladies: Kept home, taught
A body could be a traitor.
Determination: A semblance
Of the best salvaged from rest.
Passions: Love came easily
For music and dance,
Building stories better than my life,
Writing poems at every chance.
World: Water was my element,
I flirted with the hungry magic –
Of fire, at many campsites.
School: Lessons were not hard,
I studied gruelingly, but kids,
Were often less than kind,
I hurt but pursued devotedly,
A well-educated mind.
Romance: When invaded,
I embraced it and have
Never really let it go,
I have loved occasionally,
And lost much the same,
Only bits of my heart
Have remained with those
Who my passion claimed.
Tragedy: I learned a mind
Could be shattered and
After, rearranged, though
Never working quite right;
Certain God does miracles,
And pieces can be fashioned –
Into something precious, if
One lives long enough to grow.
Mission: I try to learn how to
Illustrate lessons I come to know,
Loving those who cross my path
But I often mess up on the way;
I tried, learned it is okay to be me.

© Jo Ann J. A. Jordan

I wrote the poem above in my journal. It was much different.

As a PROMPT: Take something you have created, either long past or recently, and do a critical and exhaustive reworking. I usually say calm and ignore your inner critic, but you should allow it out to play at this time.

GRATITUDE:
Time spent on the phone with my son, Alex.
My being an editor.
My ability as a writer.
WordPress: It saved my MSN Spaces blog by transferring it to Chronicles.
I woke up early enough to put the Explorer out of the rain so the leak would not cause problems.

You know the drill, do as you will.

Everything on Haphazard Creative is © Jo Ann J. A. Jordan, please consult me for permissions.

It Is A Historic Time

Some days are a fevered pitch of defeat and glory. Today was one such. I did not want to be alone, and I got my hope. I spent last night and today in my Happy Place with Richard, who challenges me to be more than I think I can be.

We did not miss a thing sitting at the tables, viewing events on a projection screen. Much of the day was moving, and sometimes in contrary ways.

We laughed riotously at unpredictable surprises and were moved deeply by others.

Change is, nothing remains the same. As a people, we must look forward and let the past collect its debts in time as is its due. I am thankful the day did not descend into chaos as was so recently the case.

I had clam chowder for the first time last night and again this evening. As I have mentioned, he cooks for me. I spent some time doing the things I would at home, reading on my tablet, and being a wastrel on my computer. He did some work, and I could distract him if I were near.

So many times, we put our hope in personalities and people. Perhaps we should recognize that over everything is the Lord who holds every destiny. Life is a gift, and we must spend each second carefully.

I have a few goals toward which I am working. I am not calling them resolutions because I expect to work on them as long as I am. One is trying to build a reservoir of self-confidence; this is sorely lacking in me. Richard suggests I do another thing, not worry about what others think about me because it is not my business. The other; just be myself and love as much as I can in any way I can.

My son, Alex, in a picture, taking a picture.

Prompt
On a day like today, we have endings and beginnings; what can you personally undertake to improve your existence? Create something on such a theme.

Gratitude Today
The transition that occurred in our nation today was peaceful.
Richard avoided a disaster.
I proofed a magazine overnight.
Music is such consolation.
I did this even though I would like otherwise.

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All Material © Jo Ann J. A. Jordan