Learning, Living

Beginning: I was love,
Softness in words, deeds,
Meeting incessant needs.
Time taught: The world,
A hard place to fall;
My mistakes, misdeeds
Caused cruel stinging pain.
Learning: Reading, writing,
Were who I quickly became.
Maladies: Kept home, taught
A body could be a traitor.
Determination: A semblance
Of the best salvaged from rest.
Passions: Love came easily
For music and dance,
Building stories better than my life,
Writing poems at every chance.
World: Water was my element,
I flirted with the hungry magic –
Of fire, at many campsites.
School: Lessons were not hard,
I studied gruelingly, but kids,
Were often less than kind,
I hurt but pursued devotedly,
A well-educated mind.
Romance: When invaded,
I embraced it and have
Never really let it go,
I have loved occasionally,
And lost much the same,
Only bits of my heart
Have remained with those
Who my passion claimed.
Tragedy: I learned a mind
Could be shattered and
After, rearranged, though
Never working quite right;
Certain God does miracles,
And pieces can be fashioned –
Into something precious, if
One lives long enough to grow.
Mission: I try to learn how to
Illustrate lessons I come to know,
Loving those who cross my path
But I often mess up on the way;
I tried, learned it is okay to be me.

© Jo Ann J. A. Jordan

I wrote the poem above in my journal. It was much different.

As a PROMPT: Take something you have created, either long past or recently, and do a critical and exhaustive reworking. I usually say calm and ignore your inner critic, but you should allow it out to play at this time.

GRATITUDE:
Time spent on the phone with my son, Alex.
My being an editor.
My ability as a writer.
WordPress: It saved my MSN Spaces blog by transferring it to Chronicles.
I woke up early enough to put the Explorer out of the rain so the leak would not cause problems.

You know the drill, do as you will.

Everything on Haphazard Creative is © Jo Ann J. A. Jordan, please consult me for permissions.

It Is A Historic Time

Some days are a fevered pitch of defeat and glory. Today was one such. I did not want to be alone, and I got my hope. I spent last night and today in my Happy Place with Richard, who challenges me to be more than I think I can be.

We did not miss a thing sitting at the tables, viewing events on a projection screen. Much of the day was moving, and sometimes in contrary ways.

We laughed riotously at unpredictable surprises and were moved deeply by others.

Change is, nothing remains the same. As a people, we must look forward and let the past collect its debts in time as is its due. I am thankful the day did not descend into chaos as was so recently the case.

I had clam chowder for the first time last night and again this evening. As I have mentioned, he cooks for me. I spent some time doing the things I would at home, reading on my tablet, and being a wastrel on my computer. He did some work, and I could distract him if I were near.

So many times, we put our hope in personalities and people. Perhaps we should recognize that over everything is the Lord who holds every destiny. Life is a gift, and we must spend each second carefully.

I have a few goals toward which I am working. I am not calling them resolutions because I expect to work on them as long as I am. One is trying to build a reservoir of self-confidence; this is sorely lacking in me. Richard suggests I do another thing, not worry about what others think about me because it is not my business. The other; just be myself and love as much as I can in any way I can.

My son, Alex, in a picture, taking a picture.

Prompt
On a day like today, we have endings and beginnings; what can you personally undertake to improve your existence? Create something on such a theme.

Gratitude Today
The transition that occurred in our nation today was peaceful.
Richard avoided a disaster.
I proofed a magazine overnight.
Music is such consolation.
I did this even though I would like otherwise.

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All Material © Jo Ann J. A. Jordan

Ties, Binding

Love is our true fate,
Given us for all goodness,
Aiding survival.


A child is a gift
Perfectly bestowed, teaching,
Lessons as we go.


We may not answer
All the questions rendered us,
But wisdom becomes


My son, Alex, and I out hiking.

Prompt:
Explore some relationship, dear to you, in a creative form. If shorts appeal, use haiku, tanka, or just limited lines.

Gratitude Today
I have a tribe.
My evening with Richard.
Good victuals.
Chocolate.
Hugs.

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All Material © Jo Ann J. A. Jordan

Weary Wear

Understanding is
Difficult when all you feel
Is magnified pain;
Welcome to the fierce party
Where the fight is to be real, heal.
Put it all away
The problem and scalding tears
No illustration
Is necessary because
Everyone has scrabbled in
The concoction made
When one forgets to close those
Cabinet doors written of
In proper legend,
The lore of continued
Battles in ongoing war.
No one becomes the victor,
Only adept at disguise.
Screams of despair
Rise, rise into pallid skies
Pain never fades, stops,
But does not lie; it destroys
Equally all of the time.

Prompt: Create something quickly, which seems you took considerable time. Try to engage all your creativity in limited moments.

Gratitude Today
I was up to see Alex off.
I finished up the magazine pages with the others.
I took a nap.
Alex made it to Jacksonville safely.
I think I will complete this post in time.

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All Material © Jo Ann J. A. Jordan

Errant Lines

It may change nothing
When I tell you, “I Love You,”
But my heart bleeds true.


When death takes someone
And shackles a living heart
To lingering loss
It is, and over-felt, cost,
Touching the ones left alive.


I am the swift ghost
Too quick for you to see past
The things you condone.


Why is it I want
The things I cannot obtain?
Life remains worthwhile.


You gave me passion,
A desire to chase after,
Love left unobtained.


You always turn up,
A memory I still keep,
Troubling my sleep.


Is the gift given
Something positively real,
Or something I feel.


My dear, I do give…
I wish I could somehow show
You all your meaning.


Whatever we did matters;
It taught us to create love
Everywhere, every way, now.


It is no cheap thing,
But an increasing need
In the real world: LOVE!


Sad songs, puppy dogs, and pictures,
To recall when you could not go on.
Yet here you are, and the memories
Are why you have the moment which
Provides all the happiness you never
Believed would be yours this time.


It is, forever shall it be, despite me.
I am a minnow in a vast lake
With no way to understand
Everything outside of me.
So many things try to swallow me.
Life is brief; love is never free.
My heart is a difficulty,
It encompasses everyone with me.


Hitch a ride over
Mountains, hang an anchor on
A star; be, you are.

© Jo Ann J. A. Jordan

Today’s Prompt: Attempt some brief stream of consciousness works. Try to capture a feeling, encouragement, inspiration, or statement of the world as you see it.

Gratitude Today
Alex and I had lunch at Buffalo Wild Wings.
We hiked the trails at SCSP.
I took photos I like with my friendly little camera.
I wrote most of the above shorts in the middle of the morning/night.
I wore my “Be Your Own Muse” sweatshirt, which is one of my favorites.

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All Material © Jo Ann J. A. Jordan